#AnimalMusings

The place where the Pets do the talking!

your PET can be our next star.

#BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law Executive Pet Staff

dean, school of IMITATION law (S.O.I.L.)

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Dean of the bountiful #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.) Gregarious Gus orchestrates the everyday activities at the #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.).  Why does he do this?  Because he IS the one and only #BarnyardLawyer himself.

associate dean

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Associate Dean Miss Penny Lane is the student advocate at the prestigious #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.).  She functions as the sounding board for Dean Gus when the still in his office is down for maintenance. 

co-administrators

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Co-Administrators Maverick & Charlie keep things running around the stratospheric #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.).  Using their engineering skills and vast experience as hotshot flyers they ensure the still in Dean Gus's office is always in good working order.  They also run things when Dean Gus is not around, and sometimes when he is.

senior professor

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Senior Professor Dame Bella Basset is the top institutional instructor at the fabled #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.).  Students beware - Dame Bella does not grade on a curve.  She does, however, make her classes extremely interesting and instructive.  If you happen to fall asleep during one of Dame Bella's classes, there will be consequences.

chief of security

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Chief of Security Sergeant Bakon maintains Law and Order, with apologies to Briscoe and Greene.  Sgt. Bakon keeps track of demerit slips and  oversees detention hall.  His main responsibilities seem to be keeping those two @TopGunKItties out of mischief.  Good luck with that. 

Chief CRIMINOLOGIST and still tester

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Chief Criminologist and Still Tester Miss Olivia is one of the most versatile staff members at the palatial #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.).  Not only is she the Criminology Instructor, Olivia is also the Interrogation Techniques Instructor, since she has so much experience confessing to anything and everything.

#BYL S.O.I.L. Adjunct Professors - Pet Nepotism Lives

Professor of Video Journalism

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The #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.) Professor of Video Journalism Rosie is a seasoned professional.  She is the ace field reporter for #AnimalMusings.  She is also the on-screen host of The Rosie Show, televised worldwide on The Animal Musings YouTube Channel,  


In her spare time, Rosie is the proprietor of Rosie's Coffee  Bar, the campus hangout when students are not in class or even when they are supposed to be in class.


Rosie resides with Miss Kiel, who is also known far and wide as the Lawyer Lady. 

Professor of ELOCUTION

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The #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.) Professor of Elocution Honor is a relative newcomer to the field.   


Honor, however, does have a fabulous background.  It only took reading two of Honor's eloquent essays for the S.O.I.L. Board of Regents to select Honor to fill this exalted position.


Coincidentally, Honor resides with Miss Kiel, known as the Lawyer Lady.

professor of equine ETIQUETTE

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The #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.) Professor of Equine  Etiquette  "Little" Red is the senior statesman of the group.  Red has many years of experience riding herd on his pasture mates and having them hoof the line.  As a retired champion racehorse, Red is well aware of the various traditions and protocols.


Also, coincidentally, Red resides with Miss Kiel aka the Lawyer Lady. 


Footnote from @TopGunKitties: Coincidence our collective arse.

interviewing

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To Be Announced once we figure out why we hired them.

still interviewing

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To Be Announced we once figure out why we hired them. 

don't worry, we will get there

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To Be Announced once we figure out why we hired them. 

A Look Back on our Initial Days at the Campus!

 Here you will find an excellent overview of Faber College, oops, of course we actually meant the extremely prestigious #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law

#BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.) Campus

the student union

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As can be seen, the Student Union is where most everything happens, whether we want it to or not.  We are proud to share that the Student Union has not been investigated by the Health Department in a number of weeks.  Quite an accomplishment, all things considered. 


SCHOOL MOTTO:  "We make Faber College look like Harvard"   


SCHOOL CHANT:  "To-o-ga"  "To-o-o-ga"  "T-O-O-O-GA"   


NOTE: We rip off none but the best, as you can plainly see.

everyone comes to rosie's

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Rosie's Coffee Bar is the inspiration for Rick's Cafe Americain, which was featured in the stage play Everyone Comes To Rick's.  The play, in turn, was the instrument on which the cult favorite movie Casablanca was based.  Here's looking at you kid.  

Much more about Rosie in The Rosie Show on The Animal Musings YouTube Channel.

scott "SCRIBE" Blystone memorial Reference Library

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The Scott "Scribe" Blystone Memorial Reference Library at the  #BarnyardLaw School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.)  is dedicated to Miss Olivia's Dad @oliviackcs.   The library is modeled very closely after the George Peabody Library, which is part of Johns Hopkins University.  There, that should take care of the copyright paranoia of one of  our staffers.  They do mean well.

Dean - #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.)

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dean gus, at your service

Gregarious Gus, Dean of The #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.), has a full complement of competent assistants, when he can remember exactly who they are and exactly where they are on campus.  Assuming of course that they are actually are on campus.

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everyone has to be somewhere

The #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law School (S.O.I.L.) strives to be as orderly and organized as possible.  To give our students the best experience possible, we maintain a state of the art seating chart, which is scientifically programmed for maximum efficiency.

All seating positions are final unless the seating monitor, Sergeant Bakon, receives enough incentive from the plaintiff to warrant his efforts to adjust.  Then maybe he will think about it.  So do not delay - make Sergeant Bakon an offer today.  Well, what are you waiting for?  NOTE: The seating chart is in the process of being updated.  We are so very behind with this project.

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in class at last

 Every once in a while, our students can pull themselves away from their outside activities.  Then Dean Gus is actually able to conduct a class or two.  He does try to set the, sometimes, high standard for our Adjunct Professors

#BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.) Et cetera

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curriculum

The #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.) uses the very finest textbooks that are available.  Of course, sometimes our choices are limited.

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Course Work

The students at the #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.) are among the best and the brightest.  This is due to them constantly being challenged with intellectual Midweek Mystery Melodramas such as this one to the right.  One of the classic, i.e. most convoluted, and most discussed of the #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.) Case Studies.  A true student body favorite. 

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with great questions come great answers, sometimes

The students at the #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.) are equal to the challenge, almost always.  As can be seen from the Midweek Mystery Melodrama solution to the left, there are answers and then there are answers.

#BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.) MORE Etc.

class project

Two of our more ambitious students (those rambunctious @TopGunKitties Maverick and Charlie, but who is keeping track) took it upon themselves to use their engineering skills to construct a working and very productive still in Dean Gus's office at the #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.).  Now THAT is a project worth mentioning.   TRY TO TOP THIS.  Go ahead, give it a try if you are that bored.

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#BarnyardLawyer Partnerships

As talented as the #BarnyardLawyer is, he cannot do it all on his own.  Occasionally he must call upon one or more of his colleagues for assistance on special projects.  One example is when he needs an aerial survey of the #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.).  In that instance he will call upon the services of those hotshot flyers, the @TopGunKitties.   Yes, the still builders themselves.  Sometimes he cannot be picky.

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#barnyardlawyer bonus

Running the #Barnyard Lawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.) is a complicated and strenuous  task indeed.  Occasionally the Board of Regents will vote to award Dean Gus a bonus or two, such as the items shown to the left.  To which Gus usually replies "Wrap it up and don't drop it".

The Official Barnyard Lawyer S.O.I.L. Song Book

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as sung by The #barnyardlawyer S.O.I.L. internationally acclaimed glee club

  

Sung to the tune of HOUSE OF THE RISING SUN

There is a Barn in Ocala Town, they call The Setting Sun

And it has been the ruin of many a poor mini, I know as I am one

Now mares, don’t let your young ones do as I have done

Spend their life in fun and frolicking in the Barn of The Setting Sun


Sung to the tune of WHISTLE WHILE YOU WORK

Hi Ho, Hi Ho

It’s off to class I go

With a bushel of oats

And lots of hopes

Hi Ho, Hi Ho


Sung to the tune of MARY LOU, if you have not guessed that by now

Hello Mary Lou, goodbye hay

She grabbed the bale and rode off on the Bay

I knew Mary Lou, I loved my hay

So hello Mary Lou, goodbye hay


Sung to the tune of SUMMER IN THE CITY, ditto

Hot time, Summer in the city

Back of my mane getting dirty & gritty

Big Boys feeling kind of frisky, 

Getting to be we are downright giddy


Sung to the tune of WHITE RABBIT

Some hay makes you larger

Some hay makes you small

The oats that they give you

Don't do anything at all

Just ask me, when I'm 10 hands tall

  

Sung to tune of CAMPTOWN RACES

Well, I came down there with my briefcase full, doodah, doodah

Oh I'll go back home knowing lots of bull, oh doo-dah day

Going to sue all night, going to sue all day

I'll spend my money on a bag of oats, somebody pass me the hay

Well, the #BarnYardLaywer sings this song, doodah, doodah

Ah the Chitown Courthouse's five blocks long oh doodah day

Going to sue all night, going to sue all day

I'll spend my money on a bag of oats, somebody pass me the hay 


Sung to the tune of - this time YOU figure it out

Zippidee do dah, Zippidee ay

My oh my a great Saturday

Plenty of sunshine coming my way

Some would have it made

But I'll be in the shade