Definitely not from the folks who brought you Dear Abby, Ann Landers, and Dear Sigmund.
Rosie will be answering your questions, no matter what the topic may be. Whether it is advice for the lovelorn or a question for the young one's science fair project, Rosie can handle them all.
Wish her luck. She will need it.
What about Chester The Fish you ask?
Marvelous story ideas you ask?
Sad in Cincinnati wants advice on an unwanted gift.
Dear Rosie: After my story appeared in Animal Musings, everyone said how cute I was and I needed to get my own Twitter account. That was well over a year ago and I still do not have one. What should I do?
Her Answer: Well Tater Tot, since you did get such a positive response to your story, it may be time to have a "come to Twitter" talk with your scribe. Let them know that just like the seven original astronauts, you indeed have "The Right Stuffing".
Dear Rosie: As you know, this is what I did while working on cruise ships as Host, Social Director, Tour Guide, and when absolutely necessary, babysitter to wayward youngsters and sometimes adults who may have stayed at the Martini Bar for one too many. As the Hospitality Director for the ROSIE Television Network, I find myself spending more and more time making sure there is an ample supply of oats and carrots for that #BarnyardLawyer character that hangs around the studio.
Her Answer: Captain Malcolm, you are referring to Gregarious Gus, Dean of the School of Imitation Law and Legal Advisor to the ROSIE Television Network . That being said, the next time Gus puts in his oats and carrots order, mention to him that he is starting to look a bit chunky.
Dear Rosie: I need at least one additional assistant, but more like three. When I became Chief of Security for the Rosie Media Empire, the below was my job description.
"Chief of Security Sergeant Bakon maintains Law and Order, with apologies to Briscoe and Greene. Sgt. Bakon keeps track of the monumental amount of guests and oversees the general security of the complex. His primary responsibilities seem to be keeping those two @TopGunKItties out of mischief. Good luck with that."
I thought the part about the @TopGunKitties was someone's idea of morbid humor. Unt, wrong! I spend almost all of my day chasing them around the complex. Help! Help! Help!
Her Answer: Sgt. Bakon, you have succinctly made your well thought-out point. Unfortunately, there is nothing in the budget to provide additional personnel for your department. There will, however, be a special envelope in your Christmas stocking this year.
Dear Rosie: I know I am the new guy around here, but I am starting to feel like a non-entity.
Her Answer: I'm sorry, who are you again?
Dear Rosie: Can you do some about the #BarnyardLawyer School of Imitation Law (S.O.I.L.) 2nd Junior Assistant Intern Lexa? Almost every day she grabs me by the foot and runs around the campus dragging me with her. Not only do I have to be dry cleaned after she does that, I am not getting any work done.
Her Answer: Here is the challenge. Lexa is bigger than me and rarely listens. Your best bet is to talk to Dean Gus regarding this situation. That is if you can find him
Dear Rosie: How in the world did I wind up amongst all of these Stuffies? I know that I have an undeniably cute name, but still, caught in the middle of all of these adorable potential chew toys?
Her Answer: Gummy Bear, you said it yourself, you have a cute name. Besides, we had one more spot to fill and Teddy Tedaloo was busy.